@RobinMcCauley: I don't need anyone with a so-called degree "to" tell me I use quotes wrong.
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@TheCatWhisprer: Just Friends is my favorite movie that shows fat guys how to get out of the friendzone through perseverance and becoming Ryan Reynolds.
@UncleDuke1969: *goes into kitchen *makes toast *pours coffee *sits at table *opens Sunday paper "WHO ARE YOU & WHY ARE YOU IN MY KITCHEN?" *sighs *leaves
@djdarrellripley: Him: I'll pay for dinner. Me: I want to pay. Him: I'll feel better if you let me pay. Me: Well, if your health is involved, go ahead...
@GeorgeScumbag: Remember ladies. It goes from Twitter to Kik to Voxer to cell phone number to address to being dismembered in a motel bathtub.