@RobinMcCauley: I don't need anyone with a so-called degree "to" tell me I use quotes wrong.
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@ArfMeasures: [during a huddle in a crucial ice hockey match] ME: Ok listen up guys [all the other players look at me] ME: Is....is anyone else cold?
@brakco: I thought I just had a bad headache but according to WebMD I'm a conjoined twin slowly dying from jaundice.
@droidbears: fyi, drug mule does not mean youll be getting stoned and riding around on a donkey... worst first day ever
@dafloydsta: HER: I'm leaving you ME: But why? HER: There's just no chemistry between us anymore CHEMISTRY: Wow, I'm like right here