@CulturedRuffian: I don't regret pressing the close button in the elevator when people are running. If they have all that energy-they should take the stairs.
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@stephenjmolloy: Me: There's a fly in my soup. Waiter: I'm so sorry, sir. I'll sort this. *puts a spider in the soup* Waiter: Hopefully this won't take too long.
@Ygrene: [me as a knight] Me: squire, young squire…do you have the time? Squire: sir by the judge of the sun, it is 3pm Me: wrong squire, it is (shutting visor) knight time