@warmyellowlight: i don't see why i have to clean the shower. imo it is the shower's job to clean me
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@viadear: Confusing the word, "jacuzzi" with, "yakuza" has gotten me in hot water with the Japanese mafia more than once.
@vanderwangwe: Her: I want to have your babies. Me: You'll have to wait until they get off from school.
@omgthatspunny: I have an eating disorder; I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets.
@Reverend_Scott: THIS IS THE COPS, COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP "No" WE WON'T ASK AGAIN "No" Ok guys, let's go. We can't ask again