@10InchesPlus: I don't think any of us would have made it to a life boat on Titanic.
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@EndhooS: [Opens hand sanitiser] ＳＵｂｍｉＴ ＹｏＵｒ ＳＯｕＬ ｔＯ ＥｔｅｒｎＡＬ ＨｅＬＬ ｆｉＲｅ [closes lid] wtf? [looks at label] LINDA YOU BOUGHT HAND SATANISER AGAIN
@abhorrent_wife: There's a fine line between confidence and delusion and I ride that shit like a bear on a unicycle.
@rikpayne: Tweeting and grocery shopping don't mix. I've been down every aisle and just realized all I have in my cart is a cabbage and someone's baby.
@timdonakowski: I wish someone would challenge me so I could help raise awareness for ice buckets.