@onelongbender: I don't think I get enough credit in my family for making my siblings look successful.
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@weinerdog4life: Literally thousands of chameleons in your house right now and you don't even know it.
@robdelaney: Need special medicine for our son’s kidneys but we can’t afford it because we bought printer ink last week :(
@stephenjmolloy: Mugger: "Hand over your stuff! No funny business!" *I give him my wallet and phone but not my business proposal to open a clown college*