@jimmytorosian: Me: I just souped up my car
Person: What kind of engine did you put in it?
*cut to me filling my car with tomato soup*
Me: Um... A fast one.
@SomthinBoutSara: Do you ever walk out of a bathroom and want to put a sign on the door that says "I was just peeing It smelled that way when I went in there"
@jake_lach: Real men don't run from problems, they fix them. Unless it's really scary
@lloydrang: I just saw a squirrel dragging a wine bottle bag up a tree.
I think I found my spirit animal.
@knot_eye: "Once we come down off this wall we'll be on the lam. That means we're fugitives, laying low, on the run..."
- condescending con descending
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