@usermcuserface: I don't think I'd be as calm as Billy Joel was in that song if an old man was sitting next to me making love to his tonic and gin.
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@Fred_Delicious: [Jumps into taxi] "FOLLOW..." [taxi driver turns around excitedly] "...ME ON TWITTER" [Jumps out & moonwalks into Olive garden]
@juliussharpe: Everyone can stop painting. We all have cameras that can take perfect pictures of everything.
@qwertying: "Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."