@LOUD_Thoughts_: I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@capricecrane: I bet that Heimlich was just a perv who molested people from behind, and one time accidentally saved someone from choking.
@catlikethiefx0: I should've been a child star so I could've gotten all my working out of the way and been an accomplished drug addict by now.
@TheBoydP: I’m not saying I’ve gained weight, I’m just saying I don’t think my belt buckle should be facing the ground…
@avaricious1: I saw a spider in my bedroom so I did what any man would do... I got in an argument with my wife so I could sleep on the couch.