@LOUD_Thoughts_: I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
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@SerenityRising: "If you can't handle me at my diddliest, you don't deserve me at my doodliest." -Ned Flanders
@Parentpains: She said she was burning with desire, so I threw a bucket of water at her. Dating is bullshit.
@elle91: I thought the CVS guy was going to ask me to join the rewards program but he said "enjoy your night" so I said "not today, thanks" and left.
@iAmDelFreaky: ~ At a bar last night ~ Her: I don't want to be alone tonight Me: Well, I can take care of that *takes her home* Me: Pick any cat you want