@OwensDamien: I don’t think Major Tom was much of an astronaut - Ground Control had to tell him to put his helmet on, FFS. That’s pretty basic stuff.
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@murrman5: "the immaturity and the copying are my main issues" I say in a whiny voice as my wife storms out of the counsellors office
@rolldiggity: "Any minute now. Any minute..." -Lincoln Logs, waiting for a phone call from Hollywood
@DurtMcHurtt: [eating an entire extra large pizza to myself] ME: *hears a knock on the door* THIS STALL IS TAKEN.
@bingowings14: [creating pandas] Angel: How about a cute looking bear thats shit at sex? God: Make it black & white we're running low on colours.