@jasonroeder: I don't think my neighbor knows my rule about not interacting unless we're both pointing at the same tornado.
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@david8hughes: [bank robbery] Robber 1: put money in the bag Robber 2: how come u get to be robber 1? Robber 4: how do u think I feel. There's only 3 of us
@markydoodoo: [eraser factory] BOSS: what makes u think ur right for the job? ME: *hands him blank piece of paper* I think my resumé speaks for itself
@StellaRtwot: I never make my guests take their shoes off at the door because it takes them longer to get out when I want them to leave.