@EricDumbTweets: I don't trust people who say "I married my best friend" because I don't think dogs can truly consent to marriage.
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@pabstdriver: I HATE when people use song lyrics as their status! It makes. me wanna SHOUT! Kick my heels back and SHOUT! Throw my arms up and SHOUT..Etc.
@leyawn: im a cat and i FREaking love turning potential energy into kinetic *pushes glass off table* your going to feed and keep me for some reason
@XplodingUnicorn: Wife: We need to go to the store. We’re out of milk. Me: We can wait a few days. Wife: We’re out of beer. Me: *dives in the car*