@TheDrunkStory: "I don't understand why people try to act drunk. I spend most of my time trying to act sober." - Florida State
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@catstronomical: What if I don't take meds? Dr: Depression What are the side effects of meds? Dr: Depression What if I stop taking the meds? Dr: Depression
@_davidlucas_: There are 70,000 Jehovah's Witnesses in Melbourne for a conference. So I'll be answering the door naked this weekend.
@iinkedZombie: [pet store] Me *looking at snakes* "CAN I FEED THEM?" Pet Store Employee [never looks up from his phone] sure. Me *putting my kids in tank*