@JermHimselfish: I don't understand why you guys complain about never being able to finish a tube of chapstick, it usually only takes me 2 or 3 bites.
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@Troman88: I hope that when the zombies finally do come, they're all dyslexic and they only go after Brians.
@TragicAllyHere: *turns around in my chair and I'm stroking a whole glazed ham in my lap* I've been expecting you.
@skickwriter: My microwave broke. So, we're finding innovative alternatives. Did y'all know the surface on top of the oven heats up, too? Honest to God.