@BigRedKraut: I don't use my hands when I change my tampon. I just sing a jaunty tune and the Disney birds come in and begrudgingly do it for me.
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@VestaTot: My coworker just took a broom and pole vaulted over the cubicle partition to confront the woman who accused her of being on speed.
@HughGoesThere: Writer: Got this great idea for a movie... “102 Dalmations.” Walt Disney: That’s way too many dalmations.
@BlindChow: Years ago I tried on my sister's bra, couldn't undo the clasp & was too embarrassed to ask for help. I'm still wearing it. I live in shame.
@UncleDuke1969: Me: I didn't get the job. Wife: Why not? M: Something about my eyesight. W: What EXACTLY did they say? M: That I needed 'adult supervision'.