@liv_thatsme: I don't wanna brag, but my therapist just told me I'm above her skill level.
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@fro_vo: WIFE: honey? ME: yes dear WIFE: did something hit the car ME: yes deer WIFE: do you know what it was ME: yes deer WIFE: was it an animal ME: yes deer WIFE: was it a rabbit ME: no deer
@usermcuserface: (Knock) Do you have a minute to talk about the lord? Me: (doesn't say a word, just dances the Macarena without breaking eye contact)