@robfee: I don't want a Hot Pocket. I'd rather have a pocket with a nice sense of humor & a pleasant personality.
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@TheDailySchmuck: "It meant nothing to me, babe. I swear!" When my girl catches me in the closet eating Devil's food cake with my bare hands.
@robfee: No matter how lazy you feel, just remember that Goldilocks decided to take a nap during a b&e.
@Barknado69: Today I saw "Jesus doesn't care about your grades" written on the sidewalk in chalk and all I could think was "Thank god, he'd be pissed"
@WildeThingy: Teacher "Hi, why are you here?" Me "Um, isn't this the beginners' philosophy class?" Teacher "Yes and you're off to a really bad start."