@sexypitabread: "I don't want no scrubs" a doctor says before she violates, like, a TON of health codes
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@simoncholland: Accidentally feng shui'd tonight when everybody wang chunged and I've never been more embarrassed. That lamp does look great there though.
@crunchenhancer: My wife asked me: "What's the most risky, dangerous food you've ever eaten." Me: "wedding cake".
@AmericanGent69: Saying "oh my gosh you're getting so big!" is cute and acceptable to say to a 6 year old. Not so much to an ex-girlfriend.
@mattyglesias: Say what you will about Fidel Castro, at least he didn't use a private email server.