@KentWGraham: I don’t want to say my wife and I are lazy, but we finally folded laundry yesterday and half the clothes don’t fit us anymore.
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@LizHackett: It's 11:48 PM. You can't sleep. Underneath your bed, there's a creepy rustle, as the clown tries to quietly unwrap and eat a granola bar.
@brendohare: Why do people say "Cannonball" when jumping into a pool, but no one says "I'm jumping into a pool" when firing a cannonball #Interesting