@D2_Barney_McG: I doubt my inferiority complex is as good as everyone else's
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@juliussharpe: Watching "Wizard of Oz". I'd forgotten how the neighbor wants to kill Toto and Auntie Em and Uncle Henry were fine with it. Family fun!
@AdderallMomma: *knocks on donation door Me: I have a donation Salvation Army: Ma'am, once again... you cannot donate your man Me: You have stupid rules!
@Meet_Joe_Cool: Potty training my twins is like the Titanic's maiden voyage... In the beginning we are excited, in the end everyone is crying and all wet.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Me: *checking into maternity ward* Hey, so remember that time when you took the baby so I could sleep? Nurse: Ma'am, this child is seven.