@nanglish: I downloaded "ambient coffee shop" track. Just low talking, dish clanking, & one lady yelling "Finn. Look at mommy. FINN. You want a scone?"
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@iamk1ts: Men: The Only creature blessed with the superpowers to make Any machine a smoke machine in kitchen especially when his wife isn't home.
@huntigula: Praying Mantis wife: Are u cheating on me? Praying Mantis husband [his missing head replaced by a marble]: What on earth gave u that idea?
@FatherWithTwins: Me: Wow, 5k followers Wife: Is your top tweet still something I said? Me: Ya Wife: Then aren't they really MY followers? Me: *drinks heavily