@katiefzack: I dress like a murderer when I walk through the sketchy park outside my dorm so murderers will be like "Oh she's cool she's one of us."
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@butterwolf: Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. Marry your enemy. Grow old together. Watch your enemy die.
@carlyken: My 8 told me he likes Skillrex because it sounds like what Transformers would sound like if they quit saving the world and formed a band.
@iliezabeth: ME: can u pick me up in ur claws DRAGON: go AWAY dammit ME: can u just put me in ur mouth pls—I wanna look out from ur teeth like im in jail
@peachgrenade: It's ironic that my sitcom about Abraham Lincoln was shot in front of a live audience.