@iresurfaced: I dropped my phone when my friend accidently bumped my arm. It didn't break but for a moment I saw her whole life flash in front of my eyes.
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@thelaurenobrien: How many times did people question the honesty of Shakira's hips before she finally decided to defend them in a song?
@PaperWash: [ouija board] me: are there any spirits with us? Speak now ouija board: H E L L O F R O M T H E O T H E R S I D E me: ....please stop
@Jake_Vig: I wish people would move over a bit in their selfies. We're redecorating a bathroom and looking for ideas.