@highwayhooligan: I eat boiled eggs, cabbage, and baked beans before the in-laws visit. They never stay long.
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@ibid78: Momma bird: welcome to the world! Baby bird: thx! M: for the next few months instead of food, I'ma just throw up in your mouth. B: wait what
@weinerdog4life: I scream, you scream, my puppet screams, my other puppet screams, the waiter screams, this is the worst first date ever
@SocialExtortion: Millions of innocent coconuts are murdered each year so you can drink their nutritious blood you insensitive health freak
@BK_Blonde: I can't imagine why more guys don't do yoga. 1. Yoga pants 2. Lots of girls 3. Lots of girls in yoga pants doing yoga moves