@nPhelendriqal: I eat pudding with a fork, so no, crossword puzzles aren't really my 'thing'.
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@Real_Countress: I'd rather everyone think I had a serious cocaine problem then them know I just finished a bag of powdered donuts to myself
@markedly: Things Ted Cruz and I have in common: 1. Love butter 2. Shy eyes 3. Resurrected from the grave during satanic bloodmoon ritual 4. Brown hair
@Mama_in_heels: My mom asked where the remote was and my son told her it was up her ass. She high-fived him and then turned around and slapped me.
@TheThomason: One nice thing about your 30s is people talk less about figuring themselves out and more about where the best sandwiches are.