@DOGGEAUX: i edited the lyrics of mr brightside using google autocomplete results
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@LaziestCanine: *beats a guitar hero song on expert mode* *changes Twitter bio to "musician/songwriter"*
@curlycomedy: The Katy Perry song that goes, "You're hot and you're cold," was actually about a microwaveable burrito.
@JohnLyonTweets: A tornado can get rough quickly, so it's important to agree on a safe word before having sex with a tornado.