@CatherineLMK: I estimate 70% of my work conversations are just me quoting made up statistics.
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@SteveSuckington: "I'll take movies for $500 Alex" Tim Burton directed this dark tale starring Johnny Depp & Helena Bonham Carter "You gotta be kidding me"
@NicCageMatch: I accidentally killed another cactus & now one of my plants is trying to grow towards the phone to call 911.
@ActuallyEmerson: Gay guys don't listen to girls talk either, but we do have the good sense to say "I know, right?!" while we wait for our turn to talk.
@PartyBitchKayla: advice to my younger self: dont bang that old man on his helicopter he’s not joe biden