@MiniiG: I fall in love too easily.
It's ditches, I fall in ditches too easily
@dubiousgenius: Scientists say Spider-Man would not be able to climb vertical surfaces due to his size. It's almost like someone made the whole thing up.
@themiltron: scully: victim died of multiple stab wounds
mulder: *throws her a file* ever heard of the knife alien
@BoogTweets: Does grape jelly go bad or do I just have wine jelly now?
@squirrel74wkgn: The teenage boy cashier just told my wife that her tampon coupon is expired...and all of Target went silent.
@2tickytacky: Lemon is supposedly a good diuretic. I ate a quart of lemon pudding and nothing is happening.