@Hormonella: I fart in church so I can sit in my own pew.
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@primawesome: Too bad the dinosaurs didn't have a Bruce Willisaurus to fly into space and blow that asteroid up.
@LeBearGirdle: Nurse: Doctor this man needs an IV! Roman Empire doctor: OF WHAT? HE NEEDS 4 OF WHAT?!
@LosLos__: Interviewer: Vader says you aren't the Jedi you used to be. What do you have to say to that? Yoda: Ousside Dagobah, cash me.
@Smooheed: *walks into room to find toddler stuck upside down yelling for help* "Hold it right there baby, Mommy's just taking a quick picture"