@TwatWaffler69: I feel like landlords who don't allow dogs but DO allow children don't know very much about children.
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@TheMichaelRock: Kids: haha you have to work and we don't have school today Me *closing the front door* I changed the wifi password. Love you guys!
@animaldrumss: Publisher: Mike we can't accept your children's book. It's far too stupid for even the stupidest child. me: It was supposed to be for adults
@stephenjmolloy: Me: "Stay back! I'm an expert when it comes to karate!" *mugger approaches* Me: "Karate is a martial art developed on the Ryukyu Islands."