@NutellaV: I fold my laundry just like everyone else. About 3 weeks after the dryer buzzes.
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@Scarlet_Rose67: Me: I have a younger sister but she's nothing like me. Him: Wow, she sounds perfect.
@Mike_Bianchi: A bathroom scale that when you stand on it just says "Your body is but a point in space; your life, a differential of time."
@CVTBaby: You know how you have that ONE hoodie that no matter when or what you're eating -- you ALWAYS spill something on it? It's cuz you're a pig.
@AdamOfEarth: January 29, 1802, 2 AM: I hope this letter finds you well. Are you up? March 2: I am, good sir April 6: Would you kindly come over? May 9: K