@stoneman67: I followed this woman on a bike with an empty baby seat for a half a mile yelling, "your baby jumped out!" before she gave me the finger.
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@calluptome: The next time there's an awkward silence, try whispering, "Did you forget your line?"
@trevso_electric: The leading method of suicide in Albania is attempting to kidnap Liam Neeson's daughter.
@lisaxy424: If you're offended by anything on my TL, whatever you do, do not look at the rest of the internet.
@SteveSuckington: "U can legally stab someone if u suspect they're a Gary." -no you can't *pulling knife from sheath* "Sounds like somthin a Gary would say"