@JennyJohnsonHi5: I forgot to bring my bags to the grocery store, people looked at me like I drove there on an aerosol can, then slit a baby seal's throat.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MsCassieDaniels: A cat is the animal equivalent of the girl who hated you for no reason in high school.
@thesulk: Then a guy with a rope necklace and flat brimmed hat came in and everyone felt better about their own problems.
@causticbob: A boy asks his mom, "Why am I black and you're white?" She says, "Don't even go there. The way that party went, you're lucky you don't bark"