@zachreinert03: I forgot to wear my glasses when I drove today. I didn't even notice I wasn't wearing them until the kid on my windshield said something
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@UduhEmeka: This is Bill Bill has a wife Bill isn't scared of his wife & says what he wants when he.. This is Bill's wife Bill is no longer available
@LizHackett: "Why don't you have kids yet?" is a great question, ma'am, but I'm saving that conversation for the right total stranger at this gym.
@Brianhopecomedy: My 4 year old told me to just turn the tire around as the top part isn't flat. I don't care if it's wrong - that's still some great logic.
@StarWarsProblms: Yoda: Clouded, your future is. Anakin: Are you smoking pot again? Yoda: Six cheeseburgers, I want.