@_steamy_mac: I found a comb on the street today, so long story short, I’ll be trying lots and lots of new hairstyles tonight.
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@thatUPSdude: Her: So, how did you get that scar on your chin? Me: *flashes back to slipping in the shower* Hunting wild boar.
@WhaJoTalkinBout: doctor: I’m afraid it’s bad news me: oh god doctor: *hands me test results* you look, I'm too scared
@AnniemuMary: My grocery store changed its whole layout. It was better the other way so I'm slowly and quietly moving everything back.