@Sassafrantz: I found out why I'm still single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you.
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@ValeeGrrl: 7yo: [points to baptism outfit hanging in closet] IS THAT TINY WHITE OUTFIT FROM WHEN I DID BABY KARATE Me: 7yo: Me: yup 7yo: AWESOME
@NickSwardson: Congrats to the person that invented the wobbly restaurant table. It's basically everywhere now.
@FavoritesYou: Why do people say its not you... it's me in a breakup? Yeah it's YOU, you're an idiot! I'm amazing... ask your brother!