@TheBoydP: "I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down"
@Josievorenkamp: Whoever figured out that you can make cake in a mug in under a minute was probably really going through some shit.
@Elizasoul80: When I misplace something and you say "where did you have it last" I feel like you don't know what misplace means.
@MrsGoose69: Before a long trip I drink allot of alcohol the night before. Dehydration will work for me for once.
@Smethanie: I bet Ryan Gosling doesn't even blow his candles out. He probably just winks at them and they faint.
@bea_ker: "Did you guys see me get so mad I flipped a table?"
Yes Tony, we saw it. You're 46. You have to stop taking your skateboard to restaurants.