@DevilryFun: I got a facial tonight by hovering over the boiling water before throwing in the mac n cheese.
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@UncleBob56: What is it Lassie? Timmy fell down a well? Earthquake in LA? The Russians are coming? You found a plane? No? ...Oh, you want another beer.
@mattytalks: Yes officer, the person who robbed me was a woman 25-30, at least 5'9, a brunette and definitely single. Can you arrange a line up please
@rolldiggity: "And if you look out to the left, you'll miss everything to the right. Remember, every choice is also a loss." - Me as a tour guide
@Contwixt: Lately I go to the restroom at the movies, but forget where I'm seated then return & just begin a new life in a new seat with a new family.