@zachreinert03: I got fired from being the events coordinator at the local orphanage. I think it's cause family day never really took off
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@eddiesteadyno: [Mon] Boss: Let's talk about your clothes Adam: But it's my best leaf B: You need officewear A: Understood [Tues] B: Is that a sticky note?
@panmidwest: ME: [repeatedly trying, and failing, to film a successful water bottle flip] DAVID ATTENBOROUGH: experts project extinction for this species
@pplwtching: Knowing when to keep opinions to yourself is a skill... That I do not possess, apparently.