@j0eg0d: I got in touch with my inner child and the little shit hung up on me.
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@WoodyLuvsCoffee: If you love something, set it free. If it returns, it probably can't pay its student loans.
@Audenary: DAD: Think an earthquake's coming. MOM: Check Rocky; dogs always know. DOG *analysing seismic data*: I anticipate magnitudes of 6 or more.
@gogglepossum: Me: My body is a temple Personal Trainer: But what about all the food and wine and parties? Me: It’s a temple to Dionysus