@j0eg0d: I got in touch with my inner child and the little shit hung up on me.
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@AGStr8upNinja: How to be a Canadian: 1) Love hockey 2) Use good manners 3) Drink Tim Hortons 4) Live in a igloo 5) Hunt moose with stick
@psybermonkey: Me: thanks for the invite but I'm really not much of a partier haha Friend: it's a search party for my missing wife
@duckpuppet: In these tough times, you can pop in the Titanic DVD to watch rich people die painfully, their money powerless against the fury of nature
@lianamaeby: The woman seated next to me wanted to know if San Francisco is near the water. I replied, "What's water?" so she wouldn't feel stupid.