@Terdoh: I had a dream where children were allowed to pick their parents, and I woke up thinking "This is not The Gates' residence."
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@TylerLinkin: A news report says hackers stole $1 Billion dollars from banks around the world. And several pens.
@JermHimselfish: Ordered a pizza. Delivery guy and I talked for 45 minutes about swords and he got fired. Now he lives here, we're gonna fight crime together
@FishySnowborder: I like my women with curves. Those skinny ones are alway mad cause they're hungry.
@cepheusjackson: SON: *first word* momma. MOM: DID YOU HEAR THAT? ME: *distracted by the faint song of an ice cream truck* He never comes down our street.