@Try2StopME: I had a pretty confused childhood because I thought obituaries are actually advertisements selling dead people.
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@AGStr8upNinja: If I had the power to control people's minds like Professor Xavier I'd probably just make them get me snacks.
@TheDairylandDon: Where do avocados come from? Uh, well, when a crocodile loves a pear very much...
@simoncholland: One fun thing about kids crying is trying to determine if they broke a crayon or got their arm stuck in a piece of farming equipment.
@PJTLynch: Alfred: About your girlfriend Catwoman... Batman: Yes, she's a thief, but- A: No, she pooped on the rug again. Right next to the litter box!