@olerunkbitch: I had no idea we were millionaires until I just saw my husband casually rip off 3 or 4 paper towels at once.
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@TheAlexP: Rapunzel is my favorite story about a girl who would do anything to have her hair pulled.
@Jandalize: Saw a teen couple buying condoms in the pharmacy so I let my grandbaby run around their feet & whispered 'that's the brand my daughter used'
@girlontapas: That awkward moment when he asks you if you're mad and you assure him that you're very happy and he says... "No, I meant, you seem crazy."
@_NinJar: I was makin out with a cute girl but it got ruined when she ran her hand up my leg and squeezed all the spaghetti out of my pocket