@cynicanoldicus: I had pamphlets printed up for when someone asks what's wrong with me.
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@IamEnidColeslaw: the women in tampon commercials should switch places with the women in antidepressant commercials
@AntozWolf: True friendship is when you walk into someone's house, and your WiFi connects automatically..
@RandySmithWhat: "[I] broke up with him because I was sick of justifying his trench coat to my friends" - Overheard on the bus