@SufficientCharm: I had sex and all I got were these kids.
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@wchoughton: Just overheard the phrase, "pregnant with a baby," and secretly wondered what the other options were.
@Aspersioncast: Annoy your wife by saying “wow” every time a chick gets out of the limo on The Bachelor.
@SveldtSmelt: Talking to women is a lot like origami. I don't know where to start and I always end up screaming.
@Ndeshi_M: Bailiff: State your name for the court Hr: Clara Sofía Alba Constanza Guadalupe... Judge: That’s enough I want to get out of here b4 lunch!