@Aredubbleyou: I hate being that creepy guy outside your window, but damn girl it's 7:30 already. You're gonna be late for work.
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@lemonmartinis: Dear people who question why girls go to the bathroom together - Hermione went alone and got attacked by a troll
@jdforshort: College guy: How do you like it? Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt ~Get outta the gutter pervs
@KKBowls: Instead of politely knocking on the bathroom door, my kid attacks the door like a rookie DEA agent on his first raid
@Tw1tter_K1tten: One thing I've learned about this world is that there are always going to be people who want to change you. -babies