@SocialExtortion: I hate going to the dentist, he is always like "did you eat Oreos before you came in?" and "you are still eating Oreos, I can see you"
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@pleatedjeans: I never pay for drinks I just insult women at bars & when they throw drinks in my face I open my mouth haha thanks for the free booze ladies
@lecalabara: Caught my son running a Google search for "adult entertainment". I was mortified. We are strictly a Bing family.