@FattMernandez: I hate horror movies where everything goes back to normal at the end. You just had a demon inside you, but yeah, let's go for pancakes.
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@justabloodygame: Damn girl, are you astrophysics? Because I don't know enough about you to finish this joke.
@SatansTongue: Stop calling hurricanes names, you're just giving them the attention that they want
@TeaAndCopy: ME: Excuse me…Where's the rowing boat equipment? EMPLOYEE: Keep going down there, Oar Aisle. ME: EMPLOYEE: ME: EMPLOYEE: ME: Or you'll what?
@ghostkrogh: [at funeral] My brother was so realistic and sensible. I guess you could say- *casket is lowered into the ground* -he was down to earth.