@imence2: I hate how every single day my ex wife just keeps waking up!
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@thejessbess: Waiter: Did we decide? Date: Yes, I'd like the Sirloin. Medium rare. Me: And I'd like the Remix to Ignition. Hot & fresh out the kitchen.
@seamussaid: I wake my daughter up by tossing pebbles at her window so the first time a suitor tries she'll have the same response we do to alarm clocks
@jdforshort: If sexual frustration could be transferred into a usable energy source, I would be sitting on a gold mine