@ThisLocalHater: I hate it when I’m trying to discreetly pick a wedgie in public and inadvertently end up doing every dance routine from Spice World.
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@kwirkyKerri: There are directions with pictures on this underarm deodorant. Yet another disaster avoided.
@longwall26: Oh, you want to fight? Ok, one second *takes off glasses, removes retainer, unpins towel cape, empties snacks from pockets, sets down kitten
@amydillon: 85% of conversations with my mom is trying to figure out who the "she" in her story is.
@Contwixt: It is true. Time flies when you are having fun. However it is also true that Time eventually rests on a tree branch and shits on your head.