@LaniBeno: I hate it when people don't behave the way I thought they would when I rehearsed the conversation in my head.
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@JCautomatic: *4yo comes in from garden with worm* Wife: TAKE IT AWAY!!! *4yo puts on top hat as I throw him a cane and starts tap dancing*
@cluedont: Why does my wife always wait until I'm at the opposite end of the house before asking me to 'Merm frner mernferr brnerfer!'?