@man_in_radiator: I hate it when people try to use big words when they clearly don't know their meaning. It makes them sound so gelatinous and isosceles.
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@TheTimmyToes: me: how much per hour? babysitter: $15 me: okay here's $2.37 million see you in 18 years
@JohnLyonTweets: Not only was my brother not mad when I backed into his Porsche, he even invited me camping and said to bring a shovel. Whew!
@AbbyHasIssues: I just typed "cupkale" instead of "cupcake" and accidentally invented what has to be the worst dessert idea ever.
@LinajkReturns: Don't you hate it when you put a freshly baked pie on the windowsill to cool and a cartoon character steals it?